Sins of the Tongue

I’ve been reading a book by Jerry Bridges called Respectable Sins which has reminded me just how often I sin with my tongue. Gossip, subtle forms of slander, backbiting, criticizing, complaining, defending, boasting, exaggerating, and blame shifting are ways in which the Scripture shows me how desperately I need Jesus.

Grace and I have simultaneously been working through World Harvest’s Sonship Course with Stu Batstone. We were given an assignment two weeks ago that has been both terrifying and incredibly helpful to draw out our self-righteous tendencies. We were asked to take a two-week period to work as diligently as we can to avoid the sins of our tongue I mentioned above. Needless to say, I lasted about one hour before I criticized the driving someone who pulled out too close to me without even thinking about it. I immediately noticed and slapped myself on the hand and said “bad Christian, you should know better.” It’s weird, I don’t have to struggle with the temptation to rob a bank, or to murder someone, or even to commit adultery, but these particular sins have proven to be incredibly ingrained and horrifically common in my speech.

I naturally have a sarcastic shtick that finds humor in irony and the ability to see the opposite of something. I gravitate towards comedians that are able to sarcastically dismiss something I find annoying. I even use sarcasm as a cheap way of dealing with problems when I’m just too lazy to get to the heart of the issue and work it out. Sarcasm, for me, has become a way in which I deal with problems when I’m unwilling to ask good gospel questions. And worse yet, sarcasm doesn’t even have to be verbalized, because I’ve been working so very hard to keep such comments in, and the sad truth is that my heart is ridiculously cynical and sarcastic. But why? Why are these “sins of the tongue” so difficult to overcome when the bigger sins are not as problematic? Because I’m a Pharisee and bigger sins are major no-no’s that I realize would kill any hope of being seen as righteous (which of course is another way of saying I wouldn’t feel righteous if I committed those sins). Sins of the tongue, on the other hand, are not on most of our radar when it comes to seeing how much progress we’re making in our sanctification. At least, not the sins that I mentioned. We make a big deal out of cursing and open slander, but we find a variety of ways to cut, condemn, criticize, and gossip. This is what makes them so pernicious and so incredibly pervasive, they are not looked at by me as all that sinful or grievous. Yet such sinful speech can be just as harmful to others as outright slaps in the face, perhaps worse since at least a slap stings on the outside but sinful speech bruises the heart.

Needless to say, this exercise had me asking some pretty powerful questions about my need to sin in this way, or at least the need to succumb to the power of these sins.

Here are a few snippits out of the lesson that I’d like to share with you.

The tongue assignment helps to show us personally that we do need the gospel every day. It also demonstrates how quick we are to justify ourselves and how much we like to look good and be right. It shows how quickly we will hurt others for our own righteousness. Our tongues reflect a far deeper reality. They show us something far bigger lies beneath. “For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil out of the evil stored up in him” (Matt. 12:34b-35). The tongue is a minute extension of the heart, so it reveals what we believe and to whom we are committed.

Our tongues also show us how spiritually proud and self-righteous we are. For example, my critical tongue often reveals a heart that is sadly out of touch with how much I have received grace, love and forgiveness. I know this because it is not loving things that are overflowing through my tongue, but instead a spirit of being better and knowing better than others. I am right and they are wrong, and I need to point it out so everyone is clear about it. I complain because I know that I am right and everyone else is wrong. Likewise, my instinctive defensiveness and the inability to apologize sincerely and quickly demonstrates that I am not really trusting Christ to be my reputation and righteousness. I must uphold my good record of performance before others. I need people to know that I am better than they think (when in fact I can safely say I am actually worse than they think). These and other failures prove how easily I slip away from living out of the gospel. Lesson #2 from Sonship

Needless to say, this is a glorious reminder of how I need God’s grace on a moment by moment basis. I need to continually bring the gospel to bare upon my speech. This is where community has to be central to working out the Gospel. I simply don’t trust my own heart to recognize when my tongue is showing a lack of rest in Christ’s righteousness. I encourage you to take a week out and try not to commit the sins of the tongue I’ve mentioned above. I’d like to hear what you found as you challenged yourself. Ask your spouse or close friend to help you with the assignment by letting you know when your tongue shows your heart straying from the gospel.

Happy hunting!